On the Job: Use the right words to get results

• Ronald M. Shapiro believes you cannot just %22wing it%22 when it comes to workplace communications
• Shapiro says people can benefit from %22scripting%22 conversations in tough situations
• Scripting can increase the odds you%27ll walk away with the results you want%2C Shapiro says

How many times have you said something at work and then wished later that you had never said it?

While politicians and celebrities may seem so skilled at communications and finding the right words with ease, many of us struggle to put our thoughts into words in a way that makes us seem professional and capable. At work, finding the right words can be critical because what we say can impact our success and how others perceive us.

That's why Ronald M. Shapiro believes you cannot just "wing it" when it comes to workplace communications.

"If you have something at stake in the communications, the question becomes why wing it if you can spend a little time perfecting your pitch to improve the odds of a successful result," he says. "All too often, we know what we want to say, but the circumstances or pressures that arise at work, like fear of a request being rejected or a tense relationship, cause us to communicate in a halting, apologetic or emotional version of what we really wanted to say."

Co-founder of Shapiro Negotiations Institute, Shapiro has negotiated more than $1 billion in contracts, and says others can benefit from "scripting" conversations.

"Scripting is the process of creating an effective message, preparing for counterarguments and delivering the results with confidence and grace across a broad range of situations," he says.

In his new book, "Perfecting Your Pitch: How to Succeed in Business and in Life by Finding Words that Work," Shapiro outlines that system and how to handle some of the toughest workplace situations such as:

-- Responding to a critical job performance evaluation: Shapiro advocates always responding with a written response because it "captures your arguments and preserves them for anyone who may read the interview down the line." It also can help in case you ever bring legal action against an employer. He suggests that such a letter include not only specifics that rebut a supervisor's comments, but also those issues that you both agree upon. Always politely request your letter be included in your personnel file. "It's important to stick up for yourself," Shapiro says, "but do it in a professional manner that doesn't alienate your bosses and get you branded as a whiner."

-- Following up on a job: Waiting to hear about a job offer can be difficult, but you don't want to make a pest of yourself by bugging a hiring manager. Shapiro advises the best way to handle a follow-up is to send an email or note that begins with "an expression of gratitude for the interview as well as an offer to respond to lingering questions." It's always a good idea to ask a friend to play devil's advocate and give feedback on your interactions so you don't come off as pushy or desperate, he says.

-- Asking for a raise: Shapiro says the biggest mistakes employees make when asking the boss for more money is letting their emotions and frustration control them and failing to "make an ask that leaves some room for negotiation." He suggests for example, that you take time to write out a script that outlines why you deserve a raise, your accomplishments, extra work that has been performed and comparable salaries. Again, someone to serve as a devil's advocate to lob tough questions your way can help you prepare to any questions. "Don't let objections or rejection put you on the defensive" and speak "confidently and not antagonistically," he says.

Shapiro says that by drafting a script, you not only hone your arguments, but you give yourself a chance to deal with your emotions. By writing down your feelings, you can better present your case without coming off as defensive, argumentative and unprofessional and increase the odds you will walk away with what you want, he says.

Anita Bruzzese is author of 45 Things You Do That Drive Your Boss Crazy ... and How to Avoid Them, www.45things.com. Twitter: @AnitaBruzzese.