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Gingerly Tattling on the Office Boor
Send your workplace conundrums to workologist@nytimes.com, including your name and contact information (even if you want it withheld for publication). The Workologist is a guy with well-intentioned opinions, not a professional career adviser. Letters may be edited.
I have a peer I’ve been working with for almost 10 years who is extremely difficult. He’s hard to get along with — a control freak, a roadblock. He also has a very poor sense of boundaries and is constantly getting involved where he isn’t needed or wanted. For all these reasons, people actively avoid having to interact with him. I think he’s stayed as long as he has because he had a few advocates in the organization who thought he added some value. They are now gone.
Now we have a new boss, who is two months into her role. It seems she is starting to see what most of us already have. But I am wondering if it would be worth giving her this feedback more directly. A few peers of mine have discussed it, and I would like to talk with her about this — but I don’t want to limit my career or be seen as a whiner. Thanks for any advice. CHICAGO
While it’s often great to show initiative, and I’m sure your new boss would appreciate candid insights, you might want to use caution in this case. After all, it sounds as if your boss is already working her way toward the conclusion you’ve made — and if your sketch of your co-worker is accurate, that is no surprise.
Certainly if the boss asks you or your peers for a take on this individual, you can be honest. But try to stick to concrete examples of problems with specific projects rather than broad-brush complaints. And don’t make it merely personal. “He held up X because he was busy intervening on Y” is better than “He’s an annoying jerk who sticks his nose in everywhere.” You might also give some thought as to whether this colleague could simply be managed in a way that saves him from his own worst tendencies.
If the boss doesn’t ask, then quietly pointing out specific issues as they occur may be appropriate — perhaps positioning them as questions rather than accusations. Make sure you and your peers are aligned. And couch your critiques in a broader, forward-looking and more upbeat context. You don’t want to leave the impression that this is mere office politics. The boss may find that unpersuasive, and even irritating.
Remember that at two months in, your new boss is still trying to get a sense of everyone’s strengths, weaknesses and personalities. So even if you just can’t wait any longer to share your views on this colleague, take care that the points you make are about what’s best for the organization — and nothing personal.
Peer Review: The Other Generation Gap
I read with interest your recent column on the workplace “generation gap.” I was fascinated that almost all the advice offered was directed toward the “older workers.” As someone with 20 years of experience in executive support at a Fortune 100 company, and now providing support to the C-suite, I want to provide an alternative point of view.
Senior leaders here — and, from what my peers at other companies tell me, elsewhere — are openly discussing their concerns and outright complaints about millennials. These include: a failure to consider how an issue or product they are working on may have an impact on other people and departments; apparently poor social skills (common courtesy, corporate manners, etc.) outside their chosen peer group; frequent insistence on using (hiding behind) instant messaging or email when a short call would be more efficient; and a surprising inability to use work-related technology effectively — even while being distracted by personal technology.
Millennials need to realize these discussions are happening, with senior leadership now accepting that they must be willing to pay more for “well seasoned” (to use a corporate euphemism for “older”) workers who have not just more experience and knowledge, but also personal discipline and an understanding of how corporate America (still) runs. ANONYMOUS
It was no surprise to receive a fresh batch of feedback on the recent “age bias” column — which was made up of tips and advice from Workologist readers aimed at (as this reader notes) “older” workers having the perhaps challenging experience of being hired or managed by people of a younger generation.
While we have most likely exhausted that subject for the moment, it did seem worthwhile to share this response. Despite the focus of that particular column, the Workologist has no quarrel with the idea that younger workers face challenges of their own. (Indeed, I respond to their dilemmas in this space all the time.)
Generalizations about any generation are questionable: Workers and managers should be judged by their individual strengths and weaknesses, by colleagues, superiors and hiring committees alike. Stereotyping isn’t just unfair; it’s bad business. And I’m certainly sympathetic if millennials react with exasperation or outrage upon reading what certain people in upper corporate echelons may be saying about them.
Nevertheless, as that earlier column made clear, generational biases clearly exist, and it may be useful for members of any workplace generation to know what they are, for better and for worse. In this case, if you’re a younger worker trying to navigate a big company, you’ve just gotten a handy list of what may be on management’s mind. That should make it easier for you to prove them wrong.
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